change me, baby!
Erstellt: 14.07.2005
Letzte Änderung: 20.07.2005
Letzte Änderung: 20.07.2005
nicht abgeschlossen (10%)
Englisch
2711 Wörter, 4 Kapitel
2711 Wörter, 4 Kapitel
Thema: Eigene Serie
this story plays in korea and it's kind of love story between two different people. but there're many things disturbing that relationship...TT__TT
Fanfic lesen
| Kapitel | Datum | Andere Formate | Daten |
|---|---|---|---|
| ~komplette Fanfic~ | V: 14.07.2005 U: 20.07.2005 |
Kommentare (4 ) 2711 Wörter |
|
| Prolog Prologue | E: 14.07.2005 U: 15.07.2005 |
Kommentare (1) 95 Wörter abgeschlossen |
|
| Kapitel 1 The f*cking guy next door | E: 14.07.2005 U: 15.07.2005 |
Kommentare (2) 703 Wörter abgeschlossen |
|
| Kapitel 2 new classmates -__- | E: 15.07.2005 U: 15.07.2005 |
Kommentare (1) 1209 Wörter abgeschlossen |
|
| Kapitel 3 Let's skip!^^ | E: 19.07.2005 U: 20.07.2005 |
Kommentare (0) 829 Wörter abgeschlossen |
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Choi Dong Wook
age: 16
lengh: 181cm
He's the main (male) character. Dong Wook always hydes his feelings towards others (he has got his reasons), so other people think he's rude and unfriendly. He is known as an uhljjang (uhljjang=best looking face; photos are put in the internet...) and many girls adore him... His best friend Kwon Tae Jin is as popular as he is. He studies Kung Fu and is also known as an good fighter who had never lost a fight... -
Han Eun Mi
age: 16
lengh: 172cm
Because of her look and her lengh she's going to a model class. Eun Mi is Ha Neul's best friend... they know each other since more than 12 years and they share all their secrets. Eun Mi loves shopping - especially shoes^^ she's kind of shoe-freak and is a queenka. -
Kim Ha Neul
age: 15
lengh: 163 cm
She's the main character of this story. Ha Neul sometimes acts a bit dumb and foolish but in fact she's kind of smart. She's very naiv, too and can't dtay normal, when anyone shouts at her...she's kind of crybaby. Anyways, Ha Neul always tries to be nice and kind but if she's really upset...then she lets the people know. Altough her parents don't treat her well she likes them a lot (especially her mother).
Her biggest dream is to find a guy, for whom she'd do everything because of love... -
Kwon Tae Jin
age: 17
lengh: 180cm
Tae Jin is Dong Wook's best friend. They know each other for a long time (they practised kung fu together). He usually skips school for a couple of weeks, but nobody knows why. He is one grade higher than the other characters, but he's going to stay there... (was heißt sitzenbleiben auf englisch???o.O). He's an uhljjang, too and drives the ladies crazy^^ -
Lee Ji Hye
age: 16
lengh: 171cm
She's the main queenka and kind of b*tch... who's full of herself and thinks she could have every guy she wants to have -___-
Ji Hye has a crush on Choi Dong Wook and her parents are his parents best friends, so they were engaged to each other (but they broke it, because of Dong Wook^^). She tries everything to get what she wants... -
Suh Soon Ho
age: 15
lengh: 176cm
He's a good mate of Ha Neul and Eun Mi and has a sudden crush on Ha Neul. But he's just too shy to tell her. Soon Ho is very smart and has the best marks in his grade.
Kommentare zu dieser Fanfic (4)
Well, nice prologue. It isn't very much but - yes! Let's see. :D
Nice greetings,
yours Sternchen
Nice greetings,
yours Sternchen
Von: abgemeldet
21.07.2005 00:59
@starlight:
danke, dass du dir so viel zeit und mühe gegeben hast einen kommi zu verfassen^^! also zunächst einmal: ich habe das auf englisch geschrieben, weil ich jetzt in den ferien mein englisch ein bisschen verbessern wollte und suche schon laaaange überall nach beta-lesern...jedoch sind anscheinend alle besetzt (siehe dich)... ich weiß dass ich schlecht bin...das liegt daran, dass mich diese sprache kaum interessiert und ich dadurch faul geworden bin, was ich jetzt nachholen will (ich spreche und lerne lieber chinesisch^-^)
mein deutsch is auch nich so, weil ich halb türkin bin un fast dauernd mit türken rumrenne...
zu meinem style: wie du vielleicht gemerkt has, is das meine erste fic überhaupt un ich bin sehr dankbar für deine tipps! ich werde sie versuchen anzuwenden, wenn und falls ich noch ne ff schreibe. ich war noch nie in amerika oda nem anderen englisch sprechenden land un habs deswegen noch nie angewendet (zum glück^^). ich schreibe trotzdem weiter, werd aba im mexx wahrscheinlich nix mehr hochladen, weil's einige leute abf*cken zu scheint...eigentlich hatte ich mir hier KONSTRUKTIVE KRITIK gewünscht (wie dein komm teilweise), aba anscheinend sin einige, ach was die meisten hier so geil darauf andere fertig zu machen, nur um selbs besser da zu stehen, dass ich keinen sinn mehr sehe hier weiter zu posten -______- .
also denn an alle, die sich oben angesprochen zu fühlen ham: SIKTIRLAN, VE GIT! HADI SALAK, GIT!!!
danke, an die die mir helfen wollten...
dann muss ich halt doch dumm bleiben un meine englischnote mein zeugnis versauen lassn... TT____TT
danke, dass du dir so viel zeit und mühe gegeben hast einen kommi zu verfassen^^! also zunächst einmal: ich habe das auf englisch geschrieben, weil ich jetzt in den ferien mein englisch ein bisschen verbessern wollte und suche schon laaaange überall nach beta-lesern...jedoch sind anscheinend alle besetzt (siehe dich)... ich weiß dass ich schlecht bin...das liegt daran, dass mich diese sprache kaum interessiert und ich dadurch faul geworden bin, was ich jetzt nachholen will (ich spreche und lerne lieber chinesisch^-^)
mein deutsch is auch nich so, weil ich halb türkin bin un fast dauernd mit türken rumrenne...
zu meinem style: wie du vielleicht gemerkt has, is das meine erste fic überhaupt un ich bin sehr dankbar für deine tipps! ich werde sie versuchen anzuwenden, wenn und falls ich noch ne ff schreibe. ich war noch nie in amerika oda nem anderen englisch sprechenden land un habs deswegen noch nie angewendet (zum glück^^). ich schreibe trotzdem weiter, werd aba im mexx wahrscheinlich nix mehr hochladen, weil's einige leute abf*cken zu scheint...eigentlich hatte ich mir hier KONSTRUKTIVE KRITIK gewünscht (wie dein komm teilweise), aba anscheinend sin einige, ach was die meisten hier so geil darauf andere fertig zu machen, nur um selbs besser da zu stehen, dass ich keinen sinn mehr sehe hier weiter zu posten -______- .
also denn an alle, die sich oben angesprochen zu fühlen ham: SIKTIRLAN, VE GIT! HADI SALAK, GIT!!!
danke, an die die mir helfen wollten...
dann muss ich halt doch dumm bleiben un meine englischnote mein zeugnis versauen lassn... TT____TT
Hi!
I'm an English native speaker and as such always delighted to find a story written in my native tongue on Animexx. However, you should really, really, really think about whether you want to continue in what obviously qualifies as a foreign language for you or whether to switch over to German.
Your grammar and spelling is practically nonexistant- at least engage the spellcheck of your MS word while writing! It's not that hard- just find "Extras"-"languages"-"set language as" and then change it to either AE or BE, whatever strikes your fancy.
As a next step, find a qualified beta- I'd offer you my services, but unfortunately I'm booked out at the moment, and as I'm a writer myself I need a little time for that, too. Thus I'd refer you to livejournal and their excellent beta rings, or you can go over to yahoo and find one there. Mayhap there's even one here on Animexx if you ask nicely... a specialised thread has been opened some time ago.
As a piece of advice: stop writing in chat format. It's annoying, it's superfluous, and it shows you don't take the time necessary to flesh out your environments and character characteristics, as their manner of speech would be a very important sign of those. Don't tell, show.
Don't announce POV changes every few lines. A good writer doesn't need to announce them at all, only does so to give information on date and location if writing a crime novel or espionage thriller. And, for heaven's sake, don't use first person narration when changing POV. First person narration is best reserved for diary entries, books written entirely from that perspective, thoughts, or autobiographies.
For budding authors, third person omniscient works best, according to my English prof. It would cause you less confusion with your tenses, as well.
Hope you're not too discouraged- I know how difficult learning to write in a foreign language is. I write in German, and it means hard work, dedication and continuous employ of my trusted thesauri. However, it's hard to say anything about plot and characterization when, to find them, you have to squelch through a succession of seemingly randomly chosen words, tenses, and casus.
I'd advise you to first get comfortable writing in a good style in your native language- be it German or any other- and then to switch to writing in English. It would ease your progression as a writer and give you time to build up your vocabulary in English.
Love from
Starlight
I'm an English native speaker and as such always delighted to find a story written in my native tongue on Animexx. However, you should really, really, really think about whether you want to continue in what obviously qualifies as a foreign language for you or whether to switch over to German.
Your grammar and spelling is practically nonexistant- at least engage the spellcheck of your MS word while writing! It's not that hard- just find "Extras"-"languages"-"set language as" and then change it to either AE or BE, whatever strikes your fancy.
As a next step, find a qualified beta- I'd offer you my services, but unfortunately I'm booked out at the moment, and as I'm a writer myself I need a little time for that, too. Thus I'd refer you to livejournal and their excellent beta rings, or you can go over to yahoo and find one there. Mayhap there's even one here on Animexx if you ask nicely... a specialised thread has been opened some time ago.
As a piece of advice: stop writing in chat format. It's annoying, it's superfluous, and it shows you don't take the time necessary to flesh out your environments and character characteristics, as their manner of speech would be a very important sign of those. Don't tell, show.
Don't announce POV changes every few lines. A good writer doesn't need to announce them at all, only does so to give information on date and location if writing a crime novel or espionage thriller. And, for heaven's sake, don't use first person narration when changing POV. First person narration is best reserved for diary entries, books written entirely from that perspective, thoughts, or autobiographies.
For budding authors, third person omniscient works best, according to my English prof. It would cause you less confusion with your tenses, as well.
Hope you're not too discouraged- I know how difficult learning to write in a foreign language is. I write in German, and it means hard work, dedication and continuous employ of my trusted thesauri. However, it's hard to say anything about plot and characterization when, to find them, you have to squelch through a succession of seemingly randomly chosen words, tenses, and casus.
I'd advise you to first get comfortable writing in a good style in your native language- be it German or any other- and then to switch to writing in English. It would ease your progression as a writer and give you time to build up your vocabulary in English.
Love from
Starlight
Von: abgemeldet
15.07.2005 22:07
U drive me crazy... XD
Hui, es fängt an romantisch zu werden *oh lala*
Ich mag die Story bisher, bin auf jeden Fall gespannt wie es weiter geht!
Hui, es fängt an romantisch zu werden *oh lala*
Ich mag die Story bisher, bin auf jeden Fall gespannt wie es weiter geht!
Von: abgemeldet
15.07.2005 21:53
erste!
hui, thats kind of cool! ^^
Die 3 Hauptcharas gefallen mir richtig gut...
Besonders diese Zicke *anbet*
Naja und Pinny ist natürlich auch cool drauf, und der Typus natürlich auch. U.U
Ich lese dann mal schnell weiter!
hui, thats kind of cool! ^^
Die 3 Hauptcharas gefallen mir richtig gut...
Besonders diese Zicke *anbet*
Naja und Pinny ist natürlich auch cool drauf, und der Typus natürlich auch. U.U
Ich lese dann mal schnell weiter!
