Tenshi   von aprileagle
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                      Kapitel 10: Guardian Angel (Part 3)
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She hadn’t noticed nightfall. For hours she had walked through the city
without seeing where she actually was going. Therefore, it came as a small shock
to realize that it had been dark outside for quite a while when she arrived at
the hotel, not really knowing how she managed to come back. She had been at the
lake a moment ago, hadn’t she? Or at the big park where the open air concert
had been over for two hours? Or in the shopping centre where all the shops were
opened till midnight, even though she didn’t know what to buy, didn’t feel
hungry to eat a burger at the fast foot restaurant where she had studied the
menu for over ten minutes and then left without eating anything. The smell of
meat made her feel sick and so she decided to skip yet another meal. As she had
done when he had been so ill. As she had done before she met the Three Lights
and Michi-chan.
Michi-chan…
She had walked all around Chicago without really knowing where exactly, but she
had found back to their hotel. Her feet ached and her shoulder felt numb from
dragging the white plastic bag along with her. However, she couldn’t have left
it at the cemetery, not after he had shown her the wonderful things inside the
shop.
He’s not here any longer…
Haruka looked around for the umpteenth time, but there was no trace of him. No
wide grin, no happy dancing, no bright laughter. Nothing. The blonde felt
suddenly very alone. As alone as she hadn’t felt since his funeral. 
Shit!
Slowly, she opened the door to their suite. Not because she didn’t want to
disturb Sejya in his TV programme, but because she felt so very tired. However,
there was no lead singer sprawled on the couch, holding the remote control like
a knight would hold his sword; the TV was black. Haruka could see light under
Yaten’s and Michiru’s bedroom doors, but she didn’t want to bother them.
Tomorrow was their final concert in America and surely they were excited and
looked again at their sheet music and at their lyrics to not mess up tomorrow.
She didn’t want to disturb them. Therefore, she dragged herself over to her
room and closed the door silently behind her. She didn’t bother to lock it,
only threw the plastic bag on the ground right in front of it.
Had her body felt like rubber this afternoon, it now felt like lead. She tore
the cap from her head. It landed on the desk which was always empty, no matter
in which hotel they were. Tahiki’s was always overflowing with contracts and
printed out emails and letters, as well, as a picture of a smiling maybe ten
year old girl. Haruka had often wondered who she was, because the three brothers
never mentioned a little sister, but she had never dared to ask, because she
knew too well how much it hurt to be asked about someone dear who wasn’t
around any longer. She’d never forgive herself if that girl’d died years ago
and she would cause him pain with her stupid, meaningless questions.
Haruka’s sunglasses followed. They made a crashing sound as they slipped over
the table’s surface and landed on the ground. She didn’t care if they were
broken. She didn’t care of anything anymore. No, she only wanted to lay down
on her bed and disappear. The way he had disappeared. Or his ghost. Or her
imagination. Or whatever it had been that had sometimes suddenly sat on her bed
or on her chair. Talking to her in her mind. Encouraging her not to give up. 
It felt as if she had lost him all over again.
Aki-chan…
She let herself fall on the bed and spreat her arms wide. Her vision was blurred
as she stared up to the ceiling, counting the patterns in the stone without
really seeing them. But she knew that they were there. She had counted them
before, endlessly, in another building in Chicago that had the same ground plan
as this hotel.
Aki-chan…
Again, Haruka remembered the first time she had been allowed to hold him. He had
been six weeks, then, because her mother had had a hard birth in Japan, although
she originally wanted to give birth in America. In Chicago. In Haruka’s
parents’ city of love. Where they got to know each other. Where they got
married. Where they decided to raise their children. Where Haruka was born over
twenty two years ago.
However, after long six weeks she sat in her mother’s rocking chair, holding
the small bundle in her arms, looking into sleepy light green eyes, stroking
through fluffy fair hair. At that moment everything had been perfect. Her
parents stood next to her to the rocking chair, their arms around each other’s
waist, looking extremely proud down on their children.
Why did they have to leave?
Haruka gulped, but couldn’t hold back the sob. Her throat hurt and the tears
burned in her eyes, although she felt too weak to actually let them fall.
Why was he taken away from me, too?
She had loved her little brother instantly, the little bundle of joy in her
arms, yawning widely, sleeping so trustingly in her soft embrace. That had been
the best moment in her life. It had been before they got to know how ill the
little boy was. Before all the therapies started. Before the tragic accident
happened. Before Haruka had to take care of her little brother all on her own,
fighting a war she couldn’t win.
Why did I have to go back today?
She could have gone so easily to the open air concert with Michiru. But then
again, she knew that she hadn’t really had a choice.
He was so happy that I finally visited him.
Haruka clenched her fists around her soft blanket, fought hard against her
tears. They didn’t change anything, only made her feel sick and even more
tired afterwards. She had an important concert tomorrow; she would accompany
Yaten with his song. Yaten who was surely already excited to perform it in front
of a big audience. She wasn’t allowed to give in to her feelings now. Maybe
she would take some days off once they were back in Japan; she deserved them,
after all, but she couldn’t disappoint the Three Lights, couldn’t disappoint
Michiru who were all counting on her and her piano play.
Fuck! I hate this!
She didn’t hear the knocking on the door nor did she hear it open. There was a
soft voice in the air, but she didn’t react to it. Only when the light was
switched on did she turn her head and stared at the person next to her bed, not
comprehending who it was nor what she was doing there. This was her parents’
bedroom, wasn’t it? The one she had moved in after the horrible accident to be
nearer to his room, to his cradle. To take care of him more quickly in the
middle of the night when he felt hungry or needed fresh nappies. Or when he was
in pain.
Did she forget to lock the apartment’s door? Did a neighbour come in? To ask
her for some food, because they had forgotten something? Bad luck; her fridge
had been empty since his funeral. Or worse, did they want to offer her their
condolences? She didn’t need their pity. She only wanted her peace!
“Ruka?”
They should leave her alone!
“Ruka? Has something happened?”
Slowly, the words penetrated her confusing thoughts. She closed her burning eyes
and as she opened them again after a deep breath, she saw Michiru standing next
to her bed, glancing concerned down at her. The young violinist wore her white
nightdress that made her look heavenly, as if she, too, was an angel. Her sea
green hair was damp and her blue eyes sleepy. Obviously, Haruka had woken her
up. The blonde wanted to apologize, but as she opened her mouth no words came
out. No sound, nothing.
“Where have you been, Ruka?”
She wanted to tell her that she’d walked through Chicago all day, that there
was no reason to be worried. Haruka wanted to assure Michiru that she still
wanted to do that boat trip with her and that she didn’t stand her up without
a good reason.
I’ve visited my little brother’s grave.
Still, no words came out and she was sure that she looked like a fish out of its
wet element. Silently, she watched Michiru sitting down on the soft mattress,
watching her with growing concern in her eyes.
“Everything alright, Ruka?”
No.
Nothing was alright. Nothing had been alright since they found out how ill her
little brother was. Nothing had been alright since her parents’ car was run
over by a truck with broken brakes. Nothing had been alright since he had a
major setback and died.
No.
Nothing would ever be alright.
“Ruka?” 
First, she had failed her so called friends and then she had failed her family.
She fought but wasn’t strong enough to save them.
“Ruka?”
Haruka needed some moments to realize that those soft hands in her hair belonged
to Michiru and that it was a comforting gesture. A calming gesture, a forgiving
one. Finally, the stillness fell from her, although she was still not able to
say anything. The only sound that escaped her throat was a pained sob. The tears
overflowed as she couldn’t hold them back any longer. The desire to hug
Michiru was suddenly irresistible, just like it had been during the Cherry
Blossom Festival in Chiba Usagi’s garden. This time, however, she wasn’t
strong enough to fight against it. This time, she blindly moved forward and
wrapped her arms around Michiru’s waist and pressed her burning face against
Michiru’s warm shoulder, not caring if her reaction was embarrassing or at
least utterly confusing for the young violinist.
“Nani…” she could hear Michiru’s voice somewhere above and felt tender
arms embracing her, holding her tight. Gentle hands continued to stroke through
blond strands and over her shaking back in a loving gesture.
“Sorry…” sobbed the blonde, not really knowing what exactly it was that
she was apologizing for. Maybe for her failure or for her strange behaviour, but
Michiru felt so good. So familiar. So alive. As if little Akito had been right
and there was still someone there for her. That she wasn’t all alone on this
damn fucking world.
“It’s okay, Ruka.” Whispered Michiru and tightened her embrace gently. She
didn’t know what had happened, but it was obvious that Haruka needed her now.
“It’s alright.”
It’s alright.
Although Haruka knew that nothing would ever be alright, she was tempted to
believe her Michi-chan. To believe that the sea beauty was mighty enough to
change her fate. No, no one could change her past, but maybe it was in this
young woman’s power that she wouldn’t be all alone in the future. Possibly,
it was safe to love her, because she wouldn’t leave her. Maybe her Michi-chan
was strong enough to stay by her side and not to die in a tragic accident or due
to a insidious illness. Haruka wanted to love the young woman who was holding
her so tenderly. She didn’t want to be alone any longer.
It’s alright.
Haruka raised her head and blindly searched for Michiru’s lips to kiss her
desperately. To feel her. To know that she was still there; that she was still
alive. To be sure that she wouldn’t disappear just like her family had done.
That this beautiful woman would stay by her side. At least for the next minutes,
hours, days. Maybe even forever.
“Ruka…” Whatever Michiru wanted to tell the blonde was silenced by another
deep kiss. It tasted salty from Haruka’s tears, but still it was sweet. It was
as passionate as the ones she had shared with the blonde only yesterday, but
Michiru could detect other feelings in Haruka’s dark green eyes, filled with
tears, still overflowing. As she broke the kiss for a brief moment to pull her
nightdress over her head and to free Haruka from her dark t-shirt, she could see
sadness and a fear in the blonde’s face. A mute loneliness that almost made
her heart break.
Who hurt you this way, my Ruka?
Michiru wanted to ask the blonde, but their lips touched again and Michiru
decided to ask her questions in the morning. Later. Right now, she wanted to
feel her Ruka, to comfort her. To love her. And to be loved back.
The young violinist fumbled for the belt of Haruka’s jeans as a thought
crossed her mind. She deserted her action and wanted to get up to lock the door
and therefore to make sure that Sejya wouldn’t walk in on them this time.
However, Haruka’s hand grabbed her arm and pulled her gently back into the
bed.
“Don’t go, Michi…” whispered the blonde and gulped. There were still
tears on her face and Michiru only hesitated for one moment. Then she gave in;
hoping that Sejya would leave them in peace this night. Otherwise, he’d regret
it. Bitterly.
“I’m here, Ruka.” Michiru leaned into another passionate kiss that turned
more gentle and slower after the young violinist had helped Haruka out of her
jeans and their naked bodies finally touched.
Michiru felt loved. Finally.
Haruka felt alive. Again.
The blonde wanted to tell Michiru how much she meant to her. That she wanted to
stay by her side. That she never wanted her to go. Ever. However, again there
were no words in her mind, only emotions. Her sobs slowly turned into silent
groans as she moved her body to the rhythm Michiru set. Her heart was no longer
empty, shallow. Now, it was filled with a tender warmth that slowly spreat
through her entire body that was no longer cold and lifeless inside.
Haruka smiled a shaky smile at Michiru who beamed back at her. Then they kissed
again.
It’s alright.
And suddenly, in her Michi-chan’s arms everything was alright.


dbdbdb

It was dawn. Outside the open window the dark sky changed into a deep purple
mixed with red and orange stripes on the horizon. The first birds sung and the
city slowly awoke to another busy day.
Michiru watched the light becoming brighter and the sun rising majestically over
Chicago’s skyscrapers. The suite was quiet; the brothers were still asleep in
their own rooms. Even Haruka slept deep and tight in Michiru’s arms. Sleep had
overtaken the blonde after their tender love making and even though the young
violinist felt exhausted and tired, she couldn’t follow her into her
dreamland. Too many thoughts swirled around in her mind. Too many questions she
couldn’t ask. At least not right now.
Why did she look so hurt last night? 
And she didn’t want to waste this night by sleeping when she could watch
Haruka with that soft smile on her face. Lying in her arms. Looking so peaceful
and happy.
Michiru gently stroked through blonde strands.
It looked like the blonde hadn’t slept the last nights and Michiru wondered
what had happened. Obviously, Haruka had had a damn good reason to miss their
open air charity concert.
What has happened?
During the past six months Michiru hadn’t seen the blonde this desperate.
True, they hardly knew anything about her and about her life in America, but
since they couldn’t tell her about their lives as Sailor Senshi, they didn’t
follow it up, but listened to everything Haruka told them. Yes, they were
friends, even close friends, but there were still limits which had to be kept.
Now, they were lovers. Maybe now it was time to share those secrets. Maybe
Haruka would understand her Senshi power and her mission. And maybe the blonde
would tell her more about her person, about her past. Maybe they could trust
each others. Just like Setsuna could trust her Elza.
We can prolong our stay here.
Michiru was convinced that Haruka’s sadness had something to do with her
family.
They had been in such a hurry to rush from one concert to the next one that they
didn’t even thought of asking Haruka if she wanted to visit her family.
She’d told them months ago that her parents and her baby brother lived in
America; surely she wanted to meet them and now those four weeks had rushed by
and there hadn’t been enough time to go to whichever city or village her
family lived in. Certainly, Haruka had been sad for not getting an opportunity
to see them and their flight back was scheduled in two days’ time. A flight
Haruka wouldn’t be able to pay from her wages the way the Three Lights did.
And even if she’d enough money, she’d probably wouldn’t have enough time,
because Tahiki already planned their next concerts. To say nothing of the long
journey. They had to cross an ocean, after all, and the jet leg was exhausting,
as well. 
This was Haruka’s chance to see her family before returning to Japan for the
next months, maybe even years, and they’d almost missed it, because they only
thought of themselves, their sightseeing trips and their concerts.
We’re so selfish.
Maybe it wasn’t the sole reason why Haruka had cried in her arms, but Michiru
was sure that it was part of the blonde’s breakdown. At least, she’d be as
sad as the young woman only hours ago at the prospect of not being able to see
her grandmother for a long time, while she’d be only some hours by train or by
plane away.
I’m the one who has to apologize.
Michiru sighed slightly and stroked again through blonde strands. Haruka
didn’t react; she was fast asleep. The small smile on her lips told the young
violinist that she was dreaming something nice. Maybe she did visit her parents
right now, in her dreams.
I also want to meet Ruka’s family.
To be introduced as the blonde’s best friend. Or, hopefully, even as her
girlfriend.
Michiru stared at the sunrise for another couple of minutes. Then, she carefully
left the bed. She tried to be as silent as possible, because she didn’t want
to wake the blonde. However, right now, nothing seemed to be able to rip Haruka
out of her wonderful dreams.
My Ruka.
Michiru smiled and leaned over the blonde to kiss her gently on her left cheek,
silently promising to be back soon.
The young violinist covered her slightly shivering body with her bathrobe and
sneaked as silently as possible out of the room. She yawned widely while she
started to make her way over to her own room, or better, her own bathroom.
However, she froze when she turned around and faced the suite’s common room,
because she wasn’t as alone as she had expected. Tahiki sat on the couch,
staring at a picture in his hands. His suit’s jacket hung over the rest and
his shirt was crumbled. He looked as if he hadn’t slept this night at all.
“Tahiki-kun?”
Michiru stepped closer to the couch, wondering if this tour had taken its toll
on all of them.
“Oh, Michiru-san.” He blinked and glanced at his watch, raising his eyebrows
in surprise. “It’s six in the morning. Why are you up so early in the
morning?”
“I could ask you the same.” Michiru brushed her hands through her hair in a
vain attempt to look a little bit less like an exploded cushion. 
“I couldn’t sleep.” Tahiki looked at the photo for the last time before he
put it into his jacket’s pocket with a soft sigh. “It’s our last concert
today.”
“I know, then we’ll go back to Japan.” Michiru squeezed his shoulder
gently. “Don’t worry, Tahiki-kun, it’ll be a great concert.”
He raised his head and watched her silently for a moment. Then he nodded and
forced himself to smile. To not give up. To not go crazy. At least not yet.
“I guess you’re right, Michiru-san.” He rose and stretched his arms.
“Since I’m already up, I’ll make some breakfast before the rest of the
pack awakes.”
“Good idea.”
It’s our last chance to find Kaki-chan.
I’ll stay in America after this concert to visit Ruka’s family.

dbdbdb

Haruka looked at the mirror’s reflection, not really seeing herself in it but
him. The concert was to start in about an hour and they were all in their
changing rooms, getting ready. Michiru simply billetted her in her own changing
room since she wasn’t as famous as the Three Lights and only performed one
song with them. However, the young violinist wasn’t there. Some strings on her
bow tore and she had to get some new to repair it, without seeing Tahiki that
there was some last minute catastrophe going on. The young man was already a
nervous wreck, asking Hashitzou again and again the same questions about the
light and the sound equipment. Haruka offered Michiru to help her, but she said
that something like that had happened before and that she knew better how to
repair her violin, anyway. The blonde should hurry up and get into her clothes;
she did have clothes different from her crew t-Shirts, didn’t she?
Haruka, seeing the panic raising in deep blue eyes, nodded instantly, got one of
those sweet kisses and was left alone in the changing room a moment later. That
had been twenty minutes ago and she hoped that Michiru would find a solution.
The young woman had enough string in their hotel room, but somehow after long
four weeks touring through such a big country, she simply forgot her first aid
violin kit, as she called it, and had to search for another violin player in the
opera hall. She didn’t want to go back to the hotel, because there wouldn’t
have been enough time.
Or maybe it’s because of last night that she forgot it.
Haruka blushed deeply at that thought and tried to concentrate on her mirror’s
reflection instead. However, her thoughts always returned to last night, and to
the morning that had followed.
I’d really wanted to go on that boat trip with her.
Haruka corrected her black shirt’s collar. It had long sleeves and fitted
perfectly to her black trousers. The clothes had been very expensive and she was
glad that the fabric showed it in its fineness. There would be thousands of fans
out there, all listening to Yaten’s song, and she didn’t want to look shabby
in comparison to the Three Lights. She didn’t want to embarrass them. The same
way she must have embarrassed Michiru with her tears the last night, although
the young woman didn’t mention her desperate outbreak it the following
morning, or better, the following noon, because when Haruka finally woke from
her deep sleep, it had been past twelve and everyone was already in a rush to
eat something, to get ready and to get a taxi to go to the concert hall. It had
been the first time in years that Haruka had slept in and it angered her that it
had been this day of all days, because her chance to invite Michiru to a boat
trip on the lake Michigan to make it up for her disappearance yesterday and for
her strange behaviour last night had passed by the time she left her bed.
To tell her that I love her.
Michiru didn’t say anything about her tears, as she didn’t mention their
love making. However, she kissed her. More than once. Showing clearly that she
had enjoyed last night’s activities and that she wanted to repeat them.
Now, the Japanese reporters are right. Now, we’re lovers.
The blonde ran her hands through her already combed hair and blinked.
Am I her girlfriend?
She had really wanted to go on that boat trip. To tell her Michi why she had
cried last night. To confess her that she was someone special to and that last
night hadn’t been a fling.
But I had to oversleep. I’m such a baka!
Haruka sighed and bowed to pick up the last of the accessories she’d wear on
the stage, playing the piano along to Yaten’s brilliant voice. There was no
use to cry over spilt milk. Right now, the concert was more important. She’d
do her best and afterwards when the tour was over and they had a little bit more
time, she’d tell Michiru. Maybe she wouldn’t tell her everything, because
some memories simply hurt too much, but she’d tell her about her little
brother and about his grave which she had visited yesterday.
I want her to be my girlfriend; she has a right to know the truth.
The blonde put the white cowboy hat on her head. The hat Aki-chan had shown her
excitedly in the shop’s window. It really did remind her of her father,
because he had worn a cowboy hat that had looked exactly the same. Too well she
could remember her mother always teasing her cowboy for performing on the stage
with that outfit, but had kissed him, nonetheless, and had wished him good luck.
To perform the classical songs she had composed only for him. To perform the
country songs he had loved so much. 
Today, I’ll perform one of those songs.
Haruka wanted to sit down on a chair and to wait patiently for Michiru to return
when she heard the loud crash in the next room. Knowing that it was one of the
Three Lights’ changing rooms and guessing that one of the brothers might just
have caused an accident, she almost flew out of the chair and over to the next
room. She didn’t care that her cowboy hat glided on her back nor did she
notice the slamming of two doors. The blonde entered the room without knocking
and knew that she had been right when she saw Yaten kneeling on the ground. A
broken water bottle laid next to him and the puddle spreat quickly. The young
man, however, didn’t think about getting away from the fluid before it ruined
his suit’s expensive trousers. Instead, he tried to collect the broken pieces.
The blood on his right hand told Haruka that he had already cut himself.
“Stop that.” Haruka crouched next to him within the blink of an eye. Gently,
she took his hands and shook them until he let go of the bottle’s fragments.
Then she helped him on his feet and almost carried him over to a chair that
stood in a corner, right across his mirror. “It’s only a bottle, Yaten-chan.
Someone else’ll take care of that.” She turned his hand carefully, ignoring
his weak struggle. She examined the wound and sighed relieved when she saw that
it was only a small cut, nothing serious, although it surely would hurt when
he’d try to play his piano in about an hour.
“Gomen…” whispered the young man and tried to escape, but she wouldn’t
let him turn away from him.
“Don’t worry, Yaten-chan. Let’s get some band-aid, okay?” She pulled a
handkerchief from her trousers’ pockets and carefully wrapped it around the
bleeding forefinger. Without thinking, she turned the young man’s hand
slightly and the sleeve slid back. For a moment, she saw the bruised wrist
before he winced and pulled his hand free.
“I can take care of it, arigatou, Haruka-neechan.” Whispered the young man
and hid his still bleeding hand behind his back.
“What’s that?” Haruka frowned and knelt down in front of him, trying to
look into his eyes, but his sunglasses blocked her view. Therefore, she raised
her right hand and took them away. Yaten tried to hinder her, but she could see
all of his pale face before she felt his sweaty left hand grabbing weakly her
right one holding the glasses, trying to hold her back. In silence, she stared
at him. At his face that was almost as white as the wall behind him. At the
black eye that was swollen. Briefly, she wondered if he was still able to see
anything with it and if it hurt a lot. Then, another, a more urgent question
sprung into her mind.
“What has happened to you, Yaten-chan?” She asked softly and raised her free
hand to stroke some silver strands out of pale face, saw the tears sparkling in
his healthy eye, felt the skin burning under her fingertips.
“You’ve got a fever, Yaten-chan.” Said Haruka surprised, because she knew
that he had been fine two days ago. Yes, it had rained, but she had made sure
that he always wore his jacket. He couldn’t have gotten sick because of it,
could he? 
What’s happened yesterday?
Suddenly, Haruka felt terrible for not having been there for him the day before.
Yes, it had been important to visit her little brother’s grave, but Yaten
should have been more important to her. He needed her. And he was alive.
“It’s nothing, really.” Yaten wanted to stand up, but she wouldn’t let
him. Instead, she pressed her palm on his sweaty forehead, feeling him burning
beneath it.
“You’ve got a real high fever, you’re ill.”
You’re ill.
Yaten’s healthy eye grew wide and two tears ran over his pale cheeks, slightly
redden from the fever raging within his trembling body.
You’re useless.
“No, it’s fine.” He shook his head and bend double as another fit of
coughing attacked him suddenly. Yaten feared to choke just as he had done so
many times the last night in which he couldn’t find any sleep. In which he
didn’t want to sleep, anyway, because he didn’t want to live all those
nightmares again.
“You’re not!” Haruka held his shoulders when he threatened to fall from
the chair. She didn’t have a clinical thermometer, but she knew that his fever
was very high and that his coughing didn’t sound good. He needed to see a
doctor. Soon.
“I’ll tell Tahiki-kun to take you back to the hotel.” Haruka wanted to
turn around and search for the oldest Three Light brother, but a small, sweaty
warm hand grabbed hers and held her back.
“No… onegai…” pleaded Yaten and gasped for breath. It sounded very sick.
“Don’t do that…”
“You need to see a doctor, Yaten-chan.”
“Not now. I need to perform.” More and more tears run over his pale cheeks.
He swayed slightly, indicating that he indeed felt very dizzy and ill.
“Forget about this stupid concert! I won’t let you go out there and cough
yourself to death!” Haruka pulled a second and last handkerchief from her
trousers and carefully wiped away the tears sparkling like little diamonds.
Like Aki-chan’s tears…
 “You’re in pain, Yaten-chan. I won’t have it.”
“But it’s our last concert in America. It’s important.” Yaten coughed
again and wrapped his arms in a protective gesture around his shivering upper
part of the body, closing his eyes, taking a deep breath that couldn’t banish
the dizziness from his mind.
“You’re more important than that, Yaten-chan.”
You’re useless.
Haruka’s soft voice felt so nice, so warm in this cold world. However, Yaten
knew that he wasn’t allowed to give in. Tahiki would be disappointed and Sejya
would never forgive him. They didn’t need him as their little brother any
longer, but they still needed him as a singer and as a piano player. If he
wasn’t able to sing with them to search for Princess Kakyuu he truly would be
useless. Then he wouldn’t have a reason any more to be with them. To dream a
dream of a time gone by. Long ago…
I never wanted you as my brother.
Sejya’s heartless voice filled his mind again and he whimpered as his headache
grew accordingly to its loudness.
Then I mustn’t fail as a Three Light, either.
“I have to perform that song today, Neechan. Onegai…” he coughed again and
felt her cool hands on his cheeks, winced a little bit when they touched the
sore flesh. “Please…”
“But you need to see a doctor, little one.”
“I need to perform that song. Maybe it’s my only chance.” 
Before they’re really fed up with me and throw me out.
“But…”
”We’ve worked so hard for today, Neechan. Please.” Yaten opened his eyes
again and blinked with his healthy eye at her, trying to get rid of those tears
revealing more from his feelings than what he wanted to show her. To show
anyone.
“Please…”
Haruka watched Yaten in silence, heard his pleas, saw again her little brother
before her who had wanted to go to Disneyland Florida to meet Mickey Mouse. He
had left the hospital the week before and they all thought that he’d survive,
that his body finally started to accept the therapies and the medicine. That
he’d stay with her. Therefore, she had granted him his wish. One of his last
wishes, as it turned out only weeks later.
“Onegai…”
She took a deep breath and glanced at the table. Quickly, she stepped through
the room, not caring that the glass splinters crackled under her heavy cowboy
boots. She took another mineral water bottle and opened it to pour some water
into a glass that already stood there. Probably, it was the one Yaten had wanted
to use before he let go of the bottle now broken on the ground. She grabbed the
sheet of paper lying next to it and returned to Yaten who leaned against the
wall, looking more dead than alive.
“Okay, Yaten-chan.” She carefully pushed the glass of water in Yaten’s
trembling hand and brought another chair next to him upon which she sat down
astride. “Drink.” She ordered, knowing that it would clear his head a little
bit and help to fight the fever. Silently, she cursed herself for not having
some pain killers on her, as she had had the past years to help her little
brother whenever the pain got unbearable. She watched him drink in small gulps
and took the glass back as he had to cough again.
“You’ll only sing this song. After that Hashitzou will take you back to the
hotel and call a doctor.”
“But… that’s impossible… there’re so many more songs…” Yaten
coughed again and shivered, although it was quite warm inside the changing
room.
“I’ll take care of the piano play and I’m sure that your brothers will
manage to sing loud enough to make it up.” Haruka looked directly into his
healthy eye, biting on her lower lip, wondering if she just made the wrong
decision.
Wondering why no one had noticed Yaten’s poor health.
Fuck, I should’ve been there for him yesterday!
She gave him some more cool water to drink and gulped when he spilled some of
it, because another coughing fit plagued him. 
Instead I had to drown in my self-pity.
“But… you don’t know the notes…”
“Then I’ll learn them quickly.” Haruka leaned forward and stoked some more
silver strands out of a burning face. “That’s my offer, Yaten-chan. You’ll
sing your song and go back to the hotel and let a doctor see after you or I’ll
call the doctor now and you won’t be able to sing anything at all.” Her
voice was soft, almost tender. There was no threat in her words, only deep
concern and a hint of a fear he couldn’t understand. He only had a cold as he
had had so often during those damn five years he had spent on this so often so
cold planet.
“I want to sing this song…” whispered the youngest singer of the Three
Lights and closed his burning eyes again. He sighed slightly when he felt
something nicely cold on his forehead, silencing his headache a little bit.
Yaten didn’t have to open his eyes again; he knew that it was Haruka’s
handkerchief which she had wetted with the remaining mineral water and had
pressed against his hot skin, cooling it down a little bit.
“Then it’s settled. You get your song and I’ll get you a doctor
afterwards.”
“Still… Sejya’ll be so pissed off, because I’m sick again…” Yaten
took a shaking breath and held the glass tighter in his trembling hands.
“He’s always so angry.” His voice was very silent and he seemed to be
talking to himself, but Haruka could hear him, nonetheless. She sat close enough
to his small form, all the while pressing her wet handkerchief against his
aching head.
“He’s so scary when he’s angry. I don’t want him to be angry with me.”
Yaten coughed and seemed to curl up on the chair.
Useless.
“Not again.”
Haruka frowned and glanced at his black eye and the bruises around his wrists
that looked as if someone had grabbed the fragile young man and held him back,
brutally. Suddenly, the young woman understood.
Fuck, no!
“I’ll kill that asshole!” she hissed quietly, dangerously.
“No, it wasn’t Sej.” Yaten set upright so abruptly that the glass slipped
from his sweaty hands and fell on the ground. It didn’t break this time, but
another small lake came into existence on the changing room’s floor, all the
same. “I fell down the stairs.”
And certainly you were holding your piano while doing so.
Haruka took a deep breath and bowed to pick up the glass. She looked around and
found another water bottle on the table.
“That’s one more reason to see the doctor.” She saw that Yaten was too
sick, too frightened to talk clearly about what had happened. His fever was too
high and the dread of not singing the song too big to tell her the truth. 
First, I’ll kick that asshole for causing Yaten-chan so much pain!
Then, I’ll kick myself for not having been there for Yaten-chan.
“The concert starts in about thirty minutes.” Haruka glanced at her wrist
watch and rose to open a third bottle and to refill the glass with fresh water.
“You’ll drink some more of that, okay? I’ll search for Michi and then
we’ll get you once the concert’s about to start, okay?” She gave him back
the cool mineral water and hesitated for a moment. But then she gave in, because
she knew that she couldn’t deny him his wish.
Our song’s the third on the programme, he’ll only has to endure this pain
for another hour, then I’ll call the doctor.
Haruka ruffled gently through his silver strands, looked into his light green
eye. Yaten tried to smile and failed piteously. Again he had to cough
violently.
Let’s just hope that it’s not a mistake.
“Neechan?”
She stopped at the door.
“Gimme back my sunglasses, please.”
“Uhm… of course…”
“Arigatou.”

dbdbdb

Sejya heard the quick steps behind him and his eyes widened when he turned
around and saw Haruka trudging towards him. She was wearing expensive looking
dark trousers and a dark shirt
No surprise there.
This time, the clothes weren’t labelled, didn’t tell the audience that she
wasn’t a famous musician but merely part of their crew.
However, she wore heavy looking cowboy boots and Sejya burst into laughter as he
saw the contrasting white cowboy hat bobbling on her back. But her glaring eyes
and the angry expression on her face sobered him up. The grin died on his face
as she grabbed his red jacket’s collar and pushed him against the next wall
with so much force that he wasn’t able to breathe for a moment.
“Nani…?” he gasped, but she didn’t listen to him.
“You’re the greatest asshole I’ve ever seen!” Her voice was low, hard,
cold. She didn’t scream, but the silence made her appear very dangerous. Like
the calm before the storm. 
“What did you just…”
“You hit him!” She shook him and he was surprised to find that his struggle
was meaningless. He tried to escape her death grip, but there was no way to get
free. Although Haruka didn’t look it, she was stronger than he was.
“You hit your little brother.”
Yaten told her; he betrayed me.
Sejya grit his teeth and tried to kick her, but she had seen it coming and
stepped on his feet before he was able to rise his knees high enough. With her
heavy boots. 
“That hurts, you bitch!”
“Not nearly enough, asshole.” Haruka seized him harder and suddenly it was
difficult for him to breathe. “It doesn’t hurt as much as Yaten’s black
eye or his maltreated wrists.”
“He…”
“Fuck! How could you do that to him?! He’s your little brother!”
“He’s not my little brother.” Now, Sejya was really angry. How dared this
stupid woman talking about things she didn’t understand? That was his damn
miserable life and shit, she had no right to rub his own mistakes in!
That’s the last day she’s worked for us, that’s for sure!
“What?” She was taken aback and he used his chance and pushed her away.
“He’s not my real brother; my parents adopted him.” Sejya wondered briefly
why he told her that, why he defended himself against her reproaches.
“And that makes you think you can beat him?” Haruka clenched her fists and
shook her head. “It doesn’t matter, you know. He adores you and you hit
him.”
I would have loved Aki-chan, no matter what.
“Shut up, you bitch!”
“You got this precious gift, and you simply threw it away.”
I would have given anything to have a little bit more time  with my Aki-chan.
You don’t know what you’re talking about.
“Shut! Up!”
He jumped forward, but she could dodge his attack easily. She swirled around and
before he could react, she had pressed his arms on his back, forcing him on his
knees.
“First, you’ll go out on that stage and have this fucking concert that seems
to be so important to everyone.” Haruka bowed menacingly over him and he was
surprised that she was so strong, that he couldn’t fight back. Hell, he was a
Star Senshi, she wasn’t supposed to be so powerful!
“You bitch!”
I’ll take care of my family matters as soon as this damn tour is over.
“Shut up, bitch!”
It’s none of your fucking business!
“First you sing your stupid songs. Then I’ll kick your ass.”
He slumbed forward as Haruka suddenly let him go. Sejya jerked his head around
to see if she would attack him further, but the blonde only put her white cowboy
hat back on her head, turned around and trudged away.

dbdbdb

Here I am.
The first song had been a solo sung by Sejya, accompanied by Michiru on her
violin. It had been a love song too trashy for her taste. The young violinist
had tried her best, but even she couldn’t save the lead singer’s unbelieving
performance. Unbelieving in Haruka’s eyes. Someone who hurt his family
wasn’t able to love a girlfriend. Not the way Sejya had sung about, even
though their fans had idolized him all through the five minutes, all the same.
I never wanted to sit here after his death.
Haruka told Yaten to sit behind the curtain out of his brothers’ sight and to
drink some more cool water. He looked even paler but still insisted on singing
his solo. Therefore, Haruka used the audience’s applause and the moment when
all lights were out on the stage to sneak over to the piano and to sit down
behind the black instrument. Yaten’s sheet music was already there, but Haruka
wouldn’t need it, at least not during the next two songs, because she had
written them. The first one for her husband and the second one for her son.
Because I thought it would be meaningless if he couldn’t listen to it.
Sejya bowed too often and too deeply for Haruka’s taste, but finally turned
around and jogged from the stage, leaving Michiru behind to face the slowly
silencing audience. The young woman stepped forward to the microphone to
announce the next song and to earn the first applause, even though she hadn’t
even start to play yet. Haruka only listened half-heartedly to her teasing
words. She stared at the black and white keys in front of her, softly stroking
over the cool material, playing the C as a signal that she was ready to play,
just the way Yaten always did.
If they couldn’t listen to it.
However, now it was different. Now she did it for Yaten, to help him catch his
breath to be able to sing his song, so that he could go back to his hotel room
afterwards and let a doctor examine him. Haruka thought hard, but in the end
decided against telling Tahiki or Michiru that Yaten had a fever. They would
have been too concerned to let the young man sing and therefore would have
destroyed his dream, as she would have broken her promise.
Michiru brought her Stradivarius to her shoulder and closed her eyes. That’s
why she didn’t see Haruka sitting at the piano when the two spotlights were
switched on and shone directly on the two musicians. A quiet murmur went through
the audience, because Haruka indeed looked different from Yaten. Besides, the
young man would have never worn a cowboy hat. Or was that some strange tribute
to the big country in which they had given so many concerts during the past four
weeks? To honour that this was their last performance in America?
Michiru didn’t notice the murmurs nor the flashes of the journalists’
cameras. She raised her repaired bow and started to play, smiling to herself
when the piano found its entry without hesitation. She played as she had played
this song the past weeks, always taking care of Yaten who still struggled with
some quavers during the second line. However, today he didn’t seem to have any
problems. He played those quavers effortlessly and even added the complicated
background music they had decided to leave out, because it was too difficult for
him. Today, however, it sounded so easy, so weightlessly, as if the piano’s
melody would float through the air.
Yaten’s been practicing hard these last weeks.
Michiru’s smile grew as she heard the silent invitation in Yaten’s music: To
trust him. To let herself fall and simply play the rhythm and the coloraturas
the way she wanted them to play regardless of his notes. He would manage. He
wouldn’t let her down. He’d carry her on his piano through the air.
Yaten played another complicated passage and she finally forgot her reserve and
gave herself into the music. The two instruments fitted perfectly to each other,
reaching out and responding in a tender dance of notes.
That’s how the song should be.
Michiru’s hands stroked her Stradivarius’ strings and although she had known
this song for so many months now, she suddenly realized that it wasn’t simply
a nice classical song a stranger had sent to her grandmother and who had given
it to her, because she liked it so much and wanted her granddaughter to play it.
Right there on the stage she saw that it was a love song. A tender love song
full of promises and a bright future. Of a happy life with the person you were
meant to be with.
So beautiful…
Haruka stared at the keys. The sheet music laid open on the piano, but she
didn’t even glance at it; she knew the song by heart. Her mother had composed
it for her father. It had been written originally for a violin and a piano; her
parents’ instruments. It had been her mother’s wedding gift to her father
and had been their song all through the years. Haruka grew up hearing it as a
lullaby. Her mother retired shortly after giving birth to Haruka while her
father continued to play the songs she continued to write for him on the stage.
However, when they sometimes played together in their house by the sea in Japan
or in one of their flats all over America and, of course, in their most
favourite city, Chicago, they had always played this song. As far as Haruka knew
they had never performed it before an audience bigger than their family.
It had been their love song.
Haruka’s mother wanted the song not to die with her and wrote in her last will
that it should be given to her daughter to perform it or if Haruka didn’t want
it, to her former teacher. Therefore, Haruka searched for the address belonging
to the Japanese name written down on the sheet of paper and sent the sheet music
to the old woman. She didn’t know how Michiru had ended up with the song, but
she was happy that it had been Michiru who got it, because she was talented. Her
violin play was almost as perfect as her mother’s had been and if there ever
was a violin player to perform the song in its right mood, it was the young
violinist standing on the wide stage in the spot light, not caring for the
audience, only caring for the music, playing it with closed eyes. Without
hesitation. With feelings. Transforming this classical arrangement into the most
emotional love song.
They had loved each other until the bitter end…
Haruka raised her head and smiled sadly as she saw the three shadows standing
next to the grand piano. Her father was a handsome, tall man with a winning
grin. His blond hair was messed, as always. Haruka’s mother was almost one
head smaller than her husband, but the smile wasn’t less brighter than his.
Her green eyes sparkled and she wore her golden kimono, her most favourite one,
with pride. 
The cowboy and the geisha.
That’s what the newspaper had always titled them. Little Akito ran around the
stage, even though neither the audience nor Michiru noticed him. He held his
blue teddy bear tightly in his small arms. His hair was silver, even though his
mother’s was as dark as the night and always plaided in a very artistic way,
just like a real geisha, although she was a musician, a wife and a mother.
Haruka’s paternal grandfather had had such silver hair, however, the blonde
had never been able to meet him for he died long before her birth. Just like her
mother’s parents died when she had been in her early teens. Yakoo had
practically been raised by her teacher for the three years following her
parents’ death until she was eighteen and old enough to go with the Tokyo
orchestra on a tour to Chicago. Where she had met Jonathan and immediately fell
in love with him. Her feelings were returned and even though her teacher
protested, they got married only a few months later. Only one year after their
marriage Haruka was born and seventeen years later, little Akito saw the light
of day.
We had a happy life.
She heard her father’s low voice in her mind, heard his South American accent
which she had loved so much, even though her American classmates had sometimes
teased her when she talked in that dialect.
We had everything we’ve ever wished for.
Her mother, on the other hand, had never got rid of her Japanese accent and
preferred to talk to her children in Japanese instead. Or sometimes to her
husband when she was angry, because he could only understand a few words. His
desperate attempts to speak in her difficult mother tongue had always calmed her
in their small fights about a curtain’s colour or about a new couch in one of
their apartments, although he still liked the old one. Yes, it had some holes
and looked worn-out, but it was still cosy to cuddle with her, wasn’t it?
We had ourselves and we had wonderful children.
Haruka watched her father bowing and taking little Akito in his strong arms.
Arms that had carried her, too, a long time ago. However, she could still
remember the feeling of security which she hadn’t felt again afterwards. Only
once. Yesterday. In Michiru’s embrace.
Luv ya, Haru-neechan.
Don’t mourn, little lamb.
Her mother stepped closer to her and Haruka smiled a shaky smile as she felt
those soft fingers on her cheeks, wiping away the two tears there. She looked
into green eyes that were so much like her own. Looked into her mother’s face
that resembled so much the face she saw every morning when she looked into her
bathroom’s mirror.
We’ll always be with you, Haru-chan. No matter, where you are.
Yakoo bowed forward and gave her daughter a light kiss on her nose, as she had
done a lot during her teenage years when Haruka had suddenly had the impression
that only babies and small children were kissed by her parents.
But now it’s time for you to live your own life.
The beautiful woman in the shining kimono stepped back to her husband and
wrapped her arms around her love and her small son.
Be as happy as we had been, Haru-chan.
Haruka glanced at Michiru still playing the song with all her heart, moving
slowly to the rhythm, and nodded.
“I’ll try…” she whispered so softly that not even the microphone near
the grand piano could catch her words. Her family, however, had heard her.
We’ll always be watching over you
Haruka nodded again and lowered her head, knowing that they wouldn’t be there
once she’d look up again.
“Goodbye…”
She closed her eyes and smiled slightly as she felt soft arms hugging her tight
for a moment and then simply letting go.
We’ll always be in your heart, my Haru-chan.
I know…
Michiru marvelled at Yaten’s excellent timing, especially in the ending of the
song. No note was too short or too long. They fitted together in perfect
harmony. Slowly, the tender song died away and the audience was silent for ten
more seconds before the first people started hesitatingly to clap until the
applause grew louder. 
Great!
Those ten seconds told Michiru that they had reached the audience. That they had
turned the song into something new, or rather, into what it originally had been
composed for, surprising their fans once more.
She opened her eyes and bowed deeply to the audience. Then she turned around to
show Yaten a proud thumb up, only to freeze when she saw the figure sitting
behind the piano, staring at the keys as if in trance. The sheet with their song
laid on the ground, untouched, unseen.
Nani?
Michiru stared at Haruka and suddenly understood why the song had been so
perfect today: Because Yaten hadn’t played it, whatever the reason. Instead,
Haruka had taken over without informing anyone except obviously the young singer
now walking over the stage, waving at his fans and smiling happily at her.
Michiru blinked as she saw the white suit he wore. She had come to be so used to
his blue suits that she stared at him dumbfounded for a moment.
He let her play?
And what’s with that outfit?
Michiru glanced from Yaten to Haruka, but the young woman still didn’t look
up. Her white cowboy hat covered her face in deep shadows. The blonde didn’t
even bow to pick up the music for the next song. Obviously, she wanted to play
it by heart. The same way she had played the last song. With so much feeling.
With so much skill. As if she hadn’t done anything else in her life than
playing the piano. With her…
“Surprise.” Whispered Yaten as he stepped closer to the micro. She frowned
at his sunglasses, but decided to say nothing. Maybe Sejya’s stupidity and
arrogance slowly rubbed off on his younger brother or Yaten thought that he
needed them to sing this song. They probably belonged to his new suit. Who knew.
She was only a violinist.
“That was successful.” She whispered back and turned to the audience to
announce Yaten’s solo to their screaming fans seeing all their dreams come
true. Finally, the youngest member had a solo, too, and they were the lucky ones
to listen to its premiere.
“Good luck.” Michiru squeezed his right arm. Then she walked off the stage.
She couldn’t wait to talk to Haruka after the concert. About their grand
performance and the feelings it had triggered in her heart.
“Arigatou, Michi-neechan.”

dbdbdb

Lying, robed in snowy white 
That loosely flew to left and right -- 
The leaves upon her falling light -- 
Thro' the noises of the night, 
She floated down to Camelot:

Yaten needed over ten minutes to change into the white suit he had bought
yesterday shortly after their open air concert. The shop assistant had been very
friendly and quickly after he had seen his golden credit card. Right now, it
seemed to give him the strength to stand on the stage and to sing the song, even
though his body trembled and his head hurt. His face seemed to be on fire and he
had difficulties breathing. However, he would sing this song. He would prove
that he was worthy to be part of the Three Lights, even though he’d never be
part of the Kou family again. That had been a nice dream, but now he had finally
awoken and had to face reality. He didn’t belong to either Tahiki nor to his
Sejya, but he could still help them do a good performance and find Kakyuu.
I’m not useless!
His trembling hand grabbed the micro without pulling it from its stands. He
wasn’t sure if he could hold it and didn’t want to lose it. Yaten raised his
right hand in the sign for Haruka to begin in her piano play. Soon, the soft
music filled the air and he started to sing, slightly surprised how strong and
self-confident his voice sounded when he felt so weak and insecure.

My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.

The words sounded so wrong in his ears, however, once, they had been true. His
life had been brilliant the day when he came to Lord and Lady Kou’s castle.
When he found a new family and loving parents. When he met his older brother
Tahiki for the first time. When he saw his Sejya for the first time.
Only this song. Then I’ll call a doctor and you’ll go back to the hotel.
Haruka played the melody from her heart, without even glancing at the keys in
front of her. Her eyes were fixed on the trembling form standing in the
limelight. Was she the only one who saw that he clung on his micro not only
because of his passion for the song, but because he needed the support to not go
on his knees? She didn’t know why he wore the white suit, but it made him look
even paler.
-Because he thinks that he doesn’t belong to them any longer.-
Haruka turned her head and saw the young woman again standing next to the piano.
Her red hair shimmered like copper in the spotlight and her eyes sparkled with
jewel tears.
You’re here.
-I’m always here.-
Haruka blinked confused, but her piano play never failed, her fingers never
forgot her mother’s lullaby for Akito-chan. Even though Yaten had changed the
lyric, it was still a song about love. Maybe not from a mother to her son, but
between two other people belonging to each other.
Who are you?
-I’m like you.- She sighed deeply and stepped closer, although her feet
didn’t touch the ground. -I’m watching over them.- Her eyes looked at the
blonde sadly. -But it’s not in my power to help them, even if they do foolish
things.-

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,

Haruka listened to the new lyric while her fingers automatically caressed the
right keys in front of her.
Do you think that he’s foolish?
-He isn’t, but my little Sejya is.- The young woman crossed her hands before
her chest as if she were praying. 
He hit him!
-I know.- Tears run over her porcelain cheeks. -It’s because he’s afraid.
They all try to be strong, but they’re so fragile inside. The whole situation
is so hard for them so that they lash out when they shouldn’t. So that they
hurt the people they love.- She turned her head and looked longingly at the
young man singing with all his heart. With all his feelings. With all his
despair as Haruka suddenly realized. Yaten had turned Aiki-chan’s lullaby into
a goodbye song. However, she hadn’t thought that he meant it. That it was so
personal.
He thinks his brothers rejected him, because he’s getting sick so easily?
-Among other things.-
But Tahiki-kun would never do that.
-As would Sejya.-
That bastard hit him.
-It was an accident; he didn’t really want to hurt him.-
Haruka looked directly into her blue eyes, seeing that the young woman meant her
words. A strange appearance that seemed to know so much about the Three Lights
as if she were a part of their little family, as well. As if she belonged to
them. The blonde gave up long ago to wonder why she could see her and if that
was sign that she had finally gone crazy. It felt right that the young woman was
here, right beside her, next to the piano, watching Yaten sing and her play.
That this was where she belonged. Somehow…
It’s such a mess.
-Please, help them. Take care of them, because I can’t do it.- She sobbed and
took a deep breath. It almost sounded like a scream and Haruka’s head jerked
around as the young woman sank weakly on her knees, stretching her hands
helplessly towards the young man. -Please, help my little angel.-

And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with… 

Haruka abandoned her piano play before his voice grew more and more silent and
finally died away. She rose so forcefully that her chair crashed on the ground
before Yaten let go of the micro. The blonde made a dash for him, almost flew
over the stage before he staggered some steps back, losing his balance.
-Help my little angel!-
Haruka caught the young man before his body hit the ground, holding his lifeless
form tightly in her strong arms, shielding him away from the journalists’
curious cameras, as well as from Tahiki’s and Michiru’s frightened
questions.
-Please.-
“Call an ambulance!”

And as the boat-head wound along 
The willowy hills and fields among, 
They heard her singing her last song, 
The Lady of Shalott.

dbdbdb


This is a little bit devilish, I know, but I couldn’t resist to cut the story
right at this point tries to hide her little horns.. But don’t worry,
there’s a fourth part of “Guardian Angels” next Monday and then you’ll
get to know more about Haruka’s past and about Yaten’s condition.

The scene when Haruka returns from the cemetery and Michiru comes to her, as
well as the scenes concerning the concert (Yaten’s fever, Haruka’s anger,
Haruka & Michiru playing that song finally together and Yaten’s breakdown)
where in my head for quite a while and I thought hard about them, changed them,
thought them over, altered my notes again and then brooded some more months
before I wrote them down in their final version.

I’m satisfied with the way they turned out, even though I had to change the
alpha version of this little lemon scene again (Bianca, here’s the
beta-version, I hope it’s better now drop, at least I like it somewhat
better). I hope you enjoyed these 17 pages as much as I did.

Oh… and some people seem to dislike James Blunt. That’s okay and perfectly
fine. You can say all you want against his voice and against the melodies. The
lyrics, however, are poetic and inspired me a great deal before and while
writing this story. And they fitted so well to the mood (and Yaten’s feelings
grin).

April

PS: Sorry, that this upload was so late in the evening (but it’s still
Monday!), however, there was so much stress at university today that I didn’t
come home before 9pm.

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